I guess since it's the beginning of 2009 I should write something. Well, I could start off by saying that I am officially engaged! I get to start off the new year by finally knowing that I will actually be married in this life. That's something I honestly was beginning to wonder about.
It's so funny, I lead a group of girls that are in their early 20's. Girls have come and gone from the group since I first started several years ago, but there is still a core number of 5 girls. One is recently married and the other 4 are all currently single, but men have come and gone. I listen to them sometimes talk about how they want to be married or find the right guy or how the guys they meet end up not being who they hoped they would be...and I remember feeling that so much throughout my own life. And as much as I try to tell them to be patient and trust in God's timing and not their own, I know how hard it is to wonder about what the Lord has in store for those of us yearning for romance and love.
But I also know that God taught that Adam needed a helper...and so came Eve. It was 'not good' for Adam to be alone. God knows it's not good for us to be alone, no man should be an island unto himself. But that doesn't mean you have to have a 'significant other' or spouse in order to have help or feel loved. There are so many family and friends that God brings into our lives for the purpose of relationship. I hope that every young lady (or man) out there who wonders if and when God is going to bring them that special someone will remember that sometimes the most special someones of all are the few people that you know have been in your life at the key moments when you needed someone most.
These girls (and my own daughter) are the reason I try to transform into Christ's likeness every day...because that is what will make them feel whole and complete - experiencing the love of Christ - from ANYONE.
John (the fiance) and I will be having a long engagement for many different reasons. So I still won't officially be a wife for over a year; but my cousin said something to me that really made me think about my own relationships. She told me that she knew I had been waiting for a very long time to find the right man and so she was happy that I was finally engaged. I don't think I was actually waiting a long time to find the right man...because there were other men that I hoped would be my husband or the last relationship in my life. I think that I finally have grown and matured to realize what a real Godly relationship looks like and I just trusted that God would work it out in His time. If it had been up to me, I would have been married years ago and probably divorced by now (or miserable). But instead, because I didn't force the issue, I know that at 36 years old, I have found the one person that truly respects me, communicates with me, loves me as only he can and will be in heaven with me as we will soon become a man and woman united in Christ with His blessing and leading. I will take that at 36 years old any day over being 22 and feeling like I am watching an hour glass counting down to when I will no longer be marketable as wife material.